Duke Nukem Forever….FAILURE!!!!

14 years after the world-famous Duke Nukem: 3D was launched we finally have a new insane and over the top first person shooter where you slay aliens and get head from sluts.  The only problem is that the only thing true about that last sentence is that you get head from sluts.  The new Duke Nukem which was released June 14th, has fallen flat on its face in my opinion.  The game tried to be way to cute and failed to meet the expectations that Duke Nukem 3D left us with.  Instead of running around like a wild man fucking shit up, you are forced to drive remote control cars and cruise around in a monster truck.  The fast paced mayhem that we all loved about the original is what we all were looking for is not what we get in the new installment.  This is only 1 of the many downfalls of DN Forever. 

     To me the worst part of the game is that you are only able to carry 2 weapons with you at a time.  Instead of having your pistol, shotgun, mini gun and RPG you now must pick only 2 to carry with you.  Yes they’re weapons everywhere on the ground that you could easily pick up and carry on with.  But that does nothing but make the player make decisions and slow the game down.  In DN 3D how many times do you remember having to fucking think.  NONE.  It was the definition of a run and gun first shooter.  It really is sad that they deviated from the original game and watered it down to more of a modern FPS.  

     Another thing I really do not like is how they handle the health.  In DN 3D you had 100% life and it went down accordingly to how much damage you take.  And the only way to gain your health is to pick up health packs lying around in the world.  This was great because you knew exactly how much life you had left, and you spent more time alive and fuckin aliens up then you did dying.  In DN Forever you have an “ego” meter.  It is a health regeneration meter which goes down after taking damage and going back up after lying low for a few seconds.  This not only makes you unsure of exactly how much health you have left it slows the game down by forcing you to lay low in order to regain your health.  Along with this awful new health system they did away with armor.  ITS FUCKING DUKE NUKEM! Armor is a key to the success of  DN 3D.  I’m not the type of player who cares a lot about the texture and graphics of a game, I mean come on I play minecraft and that games fun as shit.  But after 14 years of work put into this game i expected a way better looking game.  The multiplayer for this game is much more fun then the single player.  Constant mayhem and constant movement.  If you hate Black Ops because it is to campy and slow-paced this game will probably be for you.  But do your self a favor and stay  the fuck away from the campaign.  Duke Nukem Forever gets a 6.5/10 in my opinion and id say 4 out of that 6.5 is multiplayer.


for call of duty gameplay with commentary visit http://www.youtube.com/user/marktirv?feature=mhee